Patrick Van Negri
Stop Shoulding Yourself
Updated: Jun 19, 2022
You guys already know that I preach high-level lion mentality. Win it at all cost, enjoy the best stuff in life because life is too short, but at the same time have a piece of mind and feel good about yourself at every moment – no matter what. To go after things in life and have no regrets, no guilts, no wonders "What If?" and "I should've". That is exactly why I partnered up with Halo Top and their "Stop Shoulding Yourself" initiative. Halo Top has that mentality and philosophy, which perfectly aligns with my vision and practicality.
With that mindset, I was able to push myself to much higher standards, to new levels, new achievements, and new summits.
The greatest agony in life is the belief inside yourself you can be something, but you are holding on to an untold story, too many "shoulds" and too many "what if's". You use too much "I should" instead of just doing it. Stop overthinking, stop listening to outside noise, negative voices, excuses, and opinions that don't pay your bills.
"What if" and "I should" are the cancers of our society that rob you from achieving your goals and everything you want.
"Should" has no entitlement. Your "shoulds" will be much harder later in life than "I will".
All of that puts you behind 8-ball, and you will never get in front.
"I will" is a much better option
No matter how many times you get knocked down. You will never have to wonder "what if?". You will no have the stress and anxiety when thinking "I should do this, I should've done that". It is much easier to just do it, then to wonder and stress yourself out. I cannot stress that enough.
Personally, I am such a workaholic that I always say "I should see and hangout my friends more often this year" or "I should Skype my family and friends more often". Now I will change that into "I will" and "I am going".
With that being said, these are the shoulds I am eliminating:
1) I SHOULD SEE MY FRIENDS MORE OFTEN
2) I SHOULD SLEEP MORE
3) I SHOULD DO FLEXIBLE DIETING
I always feel stressed and feel self-guilt every time I choose to work instead of hanging out with my friends. I always say "I should see my friends more often", but that never happens.
So during this cleanse, I said "I will see my friends, at least once a week".
The same goes for sleeping more and having an enjoyable and healthy diet. Sleeping is important to me, so I demanded that I hit at least 7 hours, and no matter what, I ensured that number is the bare minimum going forward.
With the diet, I am always extremist, all or nothing type of guy. So I decided to do flexible dieting, and have the best of both worlds, and of course, a bunch of Halo Top's along with it. I am not shoulding no more.
I dissected those down in my
3 Instagram posts, so head here to dive deep into it and get inspired.
What happened when I removed those "shoulds" is that my mental state and holistic well-being came to tranquility. I had no guilt of not hanging out with my friends. I was sleeping more and not worrying if I worked enough, or that I am not consistent with my diet and that there is only one way to do it.
Your mental peace and clarity will put you in the state of next level holistic well-being and give you the motivation and energy to go for it, with no stress and doubtfulness.
It is like Halo Top, "I should eat only half a pint." No, you should not. You eat as much as you want to and feel good about it because Halo Top Creamery enables you to do both. It has been my go-to ice-cream for years, specifically for those reasons. Not only is it delicious, but it is low-calorie and high in protein aligning with my goals and well-being.
When you stop using "should" you are instantly in control. When you start using "I will" or
"I am" – you run the day, the day is not running you.
If you put your everything in something, winning or losing, you will get the reward you were looking for, no matter what the outcome is. So, stop shoulding yourself and own it; because "later in life" and turning around and looking at you right now. It is what you do now, not what you "should have done".